Black linework flash sheet with the lettering STONED BROKE AND SINGLE, crossed joints, a UFO beaming cannabis, a yin-yang of cannabis leaves and two cartoon characters, with no body placement shown.

Stoned broke and single flash sheet

Black and grey · Flash

A black linework flash sheet built around the lettering STONED BROKE AND SINGLE in a blocky, hand-drawn typeface. Surrounding it are a crossed pair of joints, a games controller, a UFO beaming up a cannabis plant, a closed magazine with a lingerie illustration on its cover, a yin-yang of cannabis leaves and two cartoon characters, all scattered with asterisks and small stars. The image is pure black ink on white with no greys or colour.

Ufo Yin yang Cartoon character Lettering Star Leaves

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A story inspired by this tattoo · fiction

Dennis Cull came back to Harrowby Comprehensive for the thirtieth reunion with a carrier bag of rolled paper and no job to speak of. The hall smelled of floor polish and the same orange squash they had poured in 1994. Nobody had asked him to bring anything, so he hadn't, except the bag, which he kept under his chair the way a farmer keeps a dog.

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Maureen Pask, who had been the headmistress's daughter and now ran the pound shop on the high street, asked him what he had been doing all this time. He said he had been waiting. She asked for what. He said he would know it when a saucer came down over the football pitch. People laughed, the way people laugh at a boy who has said the same thing since the fourth year.

At eleven the lights went out, which the caretaker had warned about. Through the high windows a grey disc hung over the pitch with a lamp swinging underneath it, and beneath the lamp a green plant the height of a goalpost rose out of the grass, its leaves bright as tinsel. Dennis stood, took the bag, and walked out across the field without his jacket. The disc hummed. Maureen followed him as far as the halfway line and no further.

The committee found the squash money counted in the morning and a single leaf pressed flat in the middle of the hall floor. Dennis was never seen again. Every year since, someone sets a carrier bag under an empty chair before the reunion, and every year the bag comes back to the committee light as air.