Colour tattoo of a cartoon shark wearing a top hat and monocle, with blue waves, on the upper back near the shoulder blade.

Enlarged with AI from a smaller original

Cartoon shark in top hat and monocle on upper back

Traditional · Back · Mixed · Photo

A cartoon shark with an open mouth full of teeth wears a black top hat with a red band and a monocle on a chain, rising from blue cartoon waves. The bold black outlines and flat fills of the shark are set against soft grey shading on its body and fin. The design sits centrally on the upper back, with the surrounding skin slightly out of focus.

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A story inspired by this tattoo · fiction

The bathing machines had been a sore point at Saltmarsh Bay for three summers, and Mortimer Gill had decided that this year somebody would finally sit down and discuss the matter properly. He arrived at the parish hall at ten past seven, hat brushed, monocle polished on his waistcoat, and took the empty chair at the head of the table without asking. Councillor Penhallow dropped her pencil. The minutes secretary, a thin man named Dougie Frayne, went quietly white and began writing very fast.

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Mortimer cleared his throat, which took some time given the number of teeth involved. He explained that the bay had been his family's since before the lighthouse, that the bathers were splashing in his shallows, and that the noise made his lunch difficult to digest. He then proposed an arrangement. He would not eat anybody between the flags provided the council left a hamper on the sea wall every Tuesday, ham preferred, with a flask of something warm. Penhallow asked whether the hamper could be cut into quarters first. Mortimer replied that he had never once in his life been rude about a sandwich.

Nobody argued. Halfway through the second pot of tea, a boy of about seven crept under the table, peered up at the great grey snout and asked why the shark wore a monocle. Mortimer adjusted it with one fin, considered the question seriously, and said it was the only sensible way to read the small print on the sea floor. The boy said that sounded very sensible indeed. Mortimer agreed that it was.

On Tuesday the hamper sat on the sea wall, ham and mustard and a flask of cocoa, with a card tucked beneath the lid in copperplate: Thank you, gentlemen. The bathing machines may stay where they are. Kindly refrain from the word scandalous in my presence. M. Gill, Esq. When the lifeboat crew rowed out, the water was calm and blue and quite empty, save for a single ripple and a faint, satisfied bubble.

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