Lettering tattoo reading REAL women WATCH FOOTBALL with red lips and a football, on the inner forearm near the wrist.

Real women watch football slogan on forearm

Lettering · Forearm · Mixed · Photo

The design shows the words REAL, women, WATCH and FOOTBALL in black block capitals, with the word women in a red script and two small red lips beside it. A brown American football with white laces sits to the right of the text. The ink appears flat and solid with clean edges, and the design is shown on pale skin against green foliage, with the photo taken at a slight angle.

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A story inspired by this tattoo · fiction

Maureen Dunphy had been told by three separate men at the Bell that she did not understand the offside rule, and not one of them had ever managed to explain it to her. So on the Saturday Hollins Park Rovers hosted Crane Street, she took her seat in the top row of the stand with a flask of tea, a bag of Refreshers and her late husband's scarf, and waited for someone to make a mistake.

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Derek Shaw, the club chairman, had wagered her a fiver that she would be gone by half time. She had her lipstick out before the kick-off, pressing a red kiss onto the back of the programme, which she then folded into her handbag like a love letter. The ball rolled about the mud in the wet manner of all Saturdays, and the Crane Street keeper spent most of the first half picking it out of his own net and looking surprised about it.

In the fortieth minute a Hollins winger ran clean through, the linesman's flag stayed down, and the whole ground groaned. Maureen stood up, cupped her hands and shouted that the lad had been level with the second last defender, which was the only thing she had been listening to all afternoon. The referee glanced up at the stand, conferred with his linesman for a long minute, then pointed firmly at the centre circle. Goal.

Derek paid the fiver at the bar without a word. Maureen bought two more programmes with it, added a second kiss to each, and posted one to the referee with a note reading only: offside, you dear man.

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