Black outline tattoo of Bart Simpson inside a heart, with the words EAT MY SHORTS above it, on a person's buttock and hip.

Bart Simpson in a heart on a hip

Other · Black and grey · Photo

A black outline tattoo of the cartoon character Bart Simpson in profile sits inside an open heart shape, with the words EAT MY SHORTS in capital letters arched above. The linework is uniform and simple, with no shading, and the ink is solid black. The skin is shown from the lower back and hip, with red and white striped lace-trimmed underwear visible at the edge of the frame.

Other Heart Cartoon character Slogan Text

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A story inspired by this tattoo · fiction

Dear Mum, you asked why I've not written since Margate. The honest answer is that the dodgem man borrowed my biro in June and I have been painting the shooting gallery banner by lamplight ever since. Mr Pellow reckons a sign must make a grown man laugh before he parts with his coins, so he wanted the yellow lad from the telly on the front, grinning sideways the way the kids in Hastings used to draw him on their bicycles.

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I did the heart first, because Mr Pellow says hearts sell tickets to people who have stopped believing in anything else. Then I got the boy's profile inside it, pencilled, rubbed out, pencilled again. His ear kept coming out looking like a seashell, and I nearly gave up. Mr Pellow came round with his flask, squinted at it, and said the trick is to stop trying to be clever and just draw a boy who is about to be cheeky.

The lettering was the worst part. He made me arch EAT MY SHORTS over the top in capitals, the way the old showmen did, so the words sat above the heart like a rainbow. I botched the S twice and the exclamation mark came out like a man falling off a ladder, so I left it, because by then he was laughing too hard to care.

On Saturday a lad from the waltzer stood under it with a candyfloss and read it out loud, then looked round to see if anyone had heard. His little sister had been begging him to say it for a fortnight, he said, and now he could tell her to go and read it herself. Mr Pellow gave me an extra shilling and called me a proper painter. I'm writing this in the caravan with the banner still drying on the rail outside. Give Nan my love, and tell her the coconut shy is definitely rigged, but not by me.