Colour tattoo of the cartoon character Dr Zoidberg from Futurama in a white coat above a yellow banner reading 'TRUST ME I'M A DOCTOR', on the lower leg, in a traditional style.

Dr Zoidberg with 'Trust me I'm a doctor' banner

Traditional · Calf · Colour · Photo

A pink cartoon alien character wearing a white lab coat and a teal shirt stands above a yellow scroll banner with black lettering that reads 'TRUST ME I'M A DOCTOR'. The character has bold black outlines and flat fills, with a red-pink body and red claws. Partial green and dark foliage shows at the edges of the frame around the skin.

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A story inspired by this tattoo · fiction

Gather in, the lot of you, and mind the rust on that bulkhead. The good ship Halloway Tern had a doctor aboard, and nobody ever believed a word he said, which was the whole trouble. Dr Pellock was pink as a poached prawn, with two great claws and eyestalks that swivelled on their own. He wore a lab coat stitched from old sail canvas, and above the infirmary door he hung a gold banner that read TRUST ME I'M A DOCTOR, so there could be no misunderstanding.

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He diagnosed everything. A snapped wrist was a wish for attention. A cracked hull plate was indigestion. Whatever a sailor brought him, Pellock squinted through his lenses, sighed, and prescribed bilge water with a biscuit. The crew stopped going to him and took their troubles to the cook instead, who at least knew the difference between a burn and a bruise.

Then came the fever in the Sargasso Reach. Captain Quill lay sweating in her bunk while the engineers argued over the coolant lines, and the ship's medicine chest held nothing but Pellock's own tonics. In desperation they carried her to the infirmary, and the doctor, for once, said nothing. He simply clacked his claws, rolled up his sleeves, and went after the coolant feed by feel, the way a crab works a sand burrow. By dawn the engines were humming and the captain was sitting up, demanding eggs.

They still hang that banner in the infirmary, though the gold has gone and only TRUST ME is readable now. Ask the old hands why it stays, and they'll tell you the same thing. Believe the words that are plainly daft, and check the reactor yourselves.

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