Colour tattoo of a white cartoon cat with a pink bow and blue eyes above black script reading Because I'm a lady, on the thigh.

Cartoon cat with script quote on thigh

Lettering · Other · Mixed · Photo

A white cartoon cat sits upright with a pink bow on its head and a pink ribbon at its neck, drawn with blue eyes, pink ears and a pink nose. Black script beneath reads Because I'm a lady. The cat has soft shading and dark outlines, and the lettering is bold and flowing against bare skin.

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A story inspired by this tattoo · fiction

Dear Maud,

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You will not believe the state of the village hall on Saturday. Ronnie's mother had the trestle tables draped in ivory, and Dulcie, of course, had to be sat on the one that held the cake. She came in through the side door at half past two, bow freshly tied, looking for all the world as though the vicar had invited her personally. When Bernard tried to lift her down, she gave him a look that could have stripped varnish and said nothing at all, which is how I knew she meant it.

The ceremony itself was lovely, though the photographer kept trying to get the cat into the frame and she kept leaving it. Halfway through the vows the ring cushion went missing. We searched the flower beds and the coat rack. It was Dulcie who found it, tucked under the velvet of the front pew where she had been sleeping like a dowager. She batted it out with one white paw, looked at each of us in turn, and began to wash.

Afterwards, when Ronnie's new wife asked me why the cat was allowed to behave so badly, I told her the truth. Dulcie has never once in eleven years apologised for anything. Her answer, whenever anyone asks, is the same one she gave the ring: because I'm a lady. I suppose it's a fine excuse if you can carry it off with a pink bow.

Write soon, and tell me whether Ronnie's cousin ever got his bow tie straightened.

Love, Ivy

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