Traditional-style colour tattoo of a cartoon character with glasses and a dark bob haircut, framed by teal leaves and a banner reading UGHHH, on a leg.

Cartoon character and UGHHH banner

Traditional · Other · Colour · Photo

The tattoo shows a cartoon character with a dark bob haircut, round glasses and a light blue top, set against a yellow and orange sun. A ribbon banner reading UGHHH sits across the lower part, with a fan-shaped shell motif below and teal leaves with pink and yellow accents arranged around the top. Bold black outlines and flat, saturated colour fills define the design, and the photograph is taken close up on a limb against a dark leather background.

Traditional Other Cartoon character Banner Lettering Leaves Shell Sun

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A story inspired by this tattoo · fiction

Nobody at the Gull's Rest had ever booked a room on purpose twice. That was my father's theory, and he was usually wrong, but on the Tuesday the foghorn went off at the pier and the whole Hartley family arrived at the front desk dripping and demanding breakfast at four in the afternoon, I started to think he might have a point.

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Mrs Hartley wanted the ferry timetable read out in full. Mr Hartley wanted to know whether the sea was legally permitted to be that green. Their son had carried a crab up from the harbour in a bucket and named it Dennis, and Dennis had since escaped into the airing cupboard, where my mother found him an hour later halfway through a tea towel. I sighed, the long kind that starts in your shoes and ends somewhere near the ceiling, and Mrs Hartley asked if I was all right. I said the sea was just very loud at the moment, which was true, and also the only thing in Saltcombe with any energy.

By six o'clock the crab was sitting on the reception counter like a hotel guest waiting for a lift, and the boy had decided it needed a room of its own. My father produced a shoebox lined with seaweed, my mother produced the guest register, and I was made to write the entry because my handwriting looks official. I wrote the name, the dates, and under reason for stay the only honest answer I could think of.

When I finished, the boy read it aloud slowly, as if it were a prayer. Room four, Dennis, one night, no complaints. For this house, I thought, that counts as a five star review.